Amazon Obhijan in Guinness World records?

3 more days to go before this movie is releaser.  Yup, I'm genuinely excited about this movie by Kamleswar Mukherjee with Dev as the protagonist.

This is probably the biggest Bangla movie in Tollywood. Don't tell me you have not seen the trailer yet? Seriously? Here is the link - you need to check it out like now. Here are some fun facts about this movie

• Budget - 25 Crores Indian Rupees - yes you read that right,  one of the biggest in Tollywood, if not the biggest budget movie in Bangla.
  
• Film was shot in Brazil.
  
• Trailer has been released in 6 languages - Bangla, Oriya, Assamese, Telegu, Tamil and last but not least Hindi!
  
• It will be released in 9 theatres in UK in January!
  
• It is releasing on the same day as Salman Khan's Tiger Zinda hain!
  
• Amazon Obhijan's poster is the biggest poster ever 97 meters (318 feet)  and taller that Victoria Memorial! This poster has earned itself a place in the Guinness World Records.
  

It is so great to see Bangla cinema venturing into projects such as these. Big budget, interesting topic and such exotic locations as Amazon.  Long live Bangla cinema!!

Bolo na Tumi Amar

Yeah, we are cool, deal with it!!

Gotta love commercial Bengali movies!! This is a rom-com from Dev's early days (2010) in the industry when he wasn't a big shot yet and he definitely wasn't ruling some obscure district in Midnapore (umm, born and raised in Kolkata, so in our make believe world, we are the centre of the universe, duhhh!!).

So yeah, did I watch the movie in its entirety? Hell yeah!

Did I make snarky comments throughout the movie!? Absolutely.

Was I predicting it scene by scene and still sitting their being entertained? You got that right. 

I actually loved how predictable it was. I just needed one of those shut off your brains and just go with  the flow kinda movies, you know the type that rake in the cash.. but my poor brain would wake up at times and be like ... but umm.. that's makes zero sense.. For example, Koyel managed to call off her wedding with groom of her dad's choice, Tota. And, the dad, Sabyasachi explained how his "honor" / status in society is going to get affected if her daughter  doesn't get married on the date that was set previously. So, solution? Find someone random and get daughter married anyway. gWHAT?? I took me a while to coax my brain back to sleep.

He could have said I have already put down deposits on the venue and caterer and it is non refundable, so yeah, you have to get married.. but no, I guess that would be too logical.

Another thing, Eevery time I see Sabyasachi in a irrational father's role in a commercial film, a part of me dies.. Why?? Why?? God why? This is our sharp Feluda? I think the Bengali community should come together and raise money so that actors like Sabyasachi don't have to do roles such as these. Some might argue, well he is just showcasing his versatility - no he is not! This is equivalent to Irfan Khan taking a dad's role in a Bollywood commercial film in 15 yrs from now... yes, I feel that strongly about it.

So what did I like?

- The Bollywood like packaging.  You have to sell something, so why not a modern Bollywood packaging?

- The styling of Dev and Koyel - very modern. Not relatable, I mean show me one, just one pizza delviery guy that dresses that stylishly in Kolkata,

- The songs. Jeet Ganguly's songs lyrics are always a bit too much - " Ei gambat chol dur hath", Pulak Bandhopadhay is probably rolling his grave hearing this, but the tunes are pretty catchy. Plus I guess this is the language of contemporary youth. I'm sure people talk amongst themselves like this - I guess no one cares about politeness anymore.

Am I a film critic? Nope, I'm just passionate cinema lover with lots of opinions!!

AparajitaTumi - (Undefeated You)

Follow @zonky2

Movie poster from the Internet

This movie's target audience was NOT me. But some people liked it enough to give it a 6.2 rating on IMDB? Why????

After I checked IMDB rating!

May be they genuinely liked it or maybe they are sadist bastards who wanted me to go through what they went through..UGHH!!!

Storyline?
This is a story about rich bastards who have achieved pretty much everything you can dream of.

Then one fine morning the protagonist (Proshenjit) thought screw this.... life is just too great let's screw it up..  let me have an affair with my friends' wife.
Then it turns out he has brain tumour and then all is magically fixed in his life.

Take home message from this movie is twofold:

1. Please have affairs- as long as you have a terminal-ish illness in the end all will be forgiven.

1a) or is because he had brain tumour he lost his sense of reasoning? Now that is the question.. told you the movie is tooooo deep for me to understand.

2. Mistresses -  If you left everything you had in your life to be with this married guy and then you find out he is really boring and is almost dying - all hope is not lost! His ex- wife will come and take care of him! You can be on your way to greener pastures. You will not be stuck with him.

But man was the movie SLOWWWWW...

if it was me, I would have fast forwarded it and watched the entire movie in 20 minutes ..

But it was family day and my I was watching it with my family. My dad never lets me forward anything, ever !! No not even songs... Because he is very positive person and even when we have given up, he has this hope that it might get better!

In this case it did not get better.

I think, hey focused so hard in capturing the whole bengali NRI sentiment they forgot that the movie needed a story line..

So this is probably what happened before they handed in their script:

Script writer 1: It's been a year we have been researching Bengali NRIs. I forget, were we supposed to do something else here?

Script writer 2: Umm, no I don't think so. I'm pretty sure we supposed to eat, drink and be merry

Directer calls and he is on speaker :

Director : Hey how is that script coming along?

Script writer 1: Script??.. ( "what script?" whispers to his colleague")

SW 2: Great sir, great! (motions his colleague to shut up)

D: Do you think you will be done by Monday? It has been some time and I have already paid for the shooting locations.

SW 2: Sure sir, that is more than enough time to put some finishing touches.. you don 't even worry. in fact it will be done way, way way before that.

D: SW2, today is Friday night..  how can it be done way way earlier? Just call me when you two morons are done writing it.

D hangs up

SW1 & 2: SHIT..... what do we do now??

And that's how Aparajito tumi was created!

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Visit to Shib Thakurer Apon Deshe...

Where " Ayin - Kanun" is Sorboneshe...

So, I'm back from a real quick trip to motherland-  And here are some of my observations that I want to share with the world and my fellow probashis...

Okay so first things first - Chief Minister of West Bengal is Mamta Banerjee... ok.. just remember that.. what you have a bad memory??

Don't worry!!

You can never EVER forget who the Chief Minister is, when you are in Kolkata or West Bengal for that matter - why you ask? 

Well, ground breaking memory research that has been happening in Kolkata has told us that repetition is key and so you will find every intersection of this densely populated state to be adorned by this pretty lady's pictures... different poses, same saree (in West Bengal we believe in living within our means!!!) 

and when there are no pictures there are clues all around the city - her party's colours blue and white to remind you who is in charge. 

You can NOT miss it.. unless you are visually impaired in which case, you can touch it and read the braille, inscriptions which says blue and white.. ( I better get credit for this, when this actually happens)

Blue and White is EVERYWHERE - on the streets, trees, busses, taxis, buildings, people, stray cows, dogs, cats (okay not quite on the animal yet - but that is the next action item on the project list. You see, we have a lot of free time --> we have fixed the infrastructure, controlled population, created jobs, abolished poverty and polio, so I mean... what else should we be doing? )

Soon, if your suitcases are not filled with blue and white clothing you will be denied entry into the city.. hey! it is HER city and she can do whatever she fancies.. 

Now, Ladies and Gentleman this is called leaving a mark on history, you see - a scar is also a mark.. but it is a mark nonetheless, right?

Can you imagine how many jobs this project must have created?? Nano factory has nothing on us.. yes, that's right rest of India, we don't care for industries.. We don't need any industries or jobs for that matter.. We can and  will paint the town black.. oops I mean blue and white.. Bengalis are known to be the sensitive, artsy type.. so this what we do!

And any of those practical Bengalis looking for a stupid 9-5 jobs that pays money... go to Pune, Mumbai, Bangalore or Delhi.. let us sit back, relax and enjoy our new MP Dev's Bangla movies where Mika Singh, sings Punjabi item numbers and scantly clothed Videsi girls randomly dance in the background... Singing in Bangla is just so last century! Who even does that, anymore??

Oh, by the way if you want to watch Parmabrata's "Lorai" that has substance - you better be ready to catch the morning show at Inox. 

If you can't be ready to catch the 9 am show at Inox, be prepared to hike to some shitty standalone theatre in some obscure part of the city.. because all the prime time shows at the multiplexes have been taken over by the latest mainstream Hollywood or Bollywood movies. 

What is that you say? Promoting local talent? Now, why would we do that? SRK is the ambassador of Kolkata and not Parambrata.. and so why should we be wasting any money on anything that is local? Are we stupid??? We would rather invest that in buying blue and white paint or golden coloured bangles for girls that need education!

Oh and you dare not say anything aloud or comment about it on any social media platform -------> Big Sister is watching!

And that was my rant.... Enjoy your day!

Dawat- E- Ishq

It’s a Sunday afternoon and it is snowing A LOT! If I glance outside of the window of my living room it looks like I have suddenly been transported to "Hundi" - remember how Gupi Bagha went there by mistake. I can't see any other colour than white.. but you know what? I'm happy.  

"Tu Meri Mannat" from Dawat- E- Ishq has been playing on repeat on my laptop! My better half keeps offering me a headphone.. apparently 20 times on repeat is enough for him.. but I can listen to it for a few 100 more times. It's just not the song, it is how the combination of the song and the video made me feel is what I try to capture and recapture. He just doesn't get it!! Check it out at the link below:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGEsDM52BXk

So as you can tell, I watched Dawat- E - Ishq this weekend and I can't wait to tell you all about it.

I just can't get over the songs.. it is romantic and magical and it transports me to a different world. Kudos to Jatin - Lalit. It show cases Lucknow, the food, the simple people.. above all the character of Tariq - his simplicity, his capacity to love,  his ability to win people over really stand out.

It is a love story - what a surprise! Right? But this one of those films that you are not going to judge every second and think "really! ?" in your head . You are not going to try to be logical.

The story is fresh. Yes there is still your hero, heroine, dancing around the Lucknow( it is Bollywood after all) but the villain is the age old traditions and customs and not the father of the daughter or some goon in the village... which is very unique.

So, I have a habit of watching a movie and then if I like an actor or a character they played, I youtube their interviews that they gave to promote their movie. Why? Just to see how much are they like their character in real life. Do they speak differently than the character? And generally I always see a pattern and in my head I picture - okay this what the person is like in real life and blah blah.. if you are a fan of Friends, you might notice Matthew Perry and Jennifer Aniston talks the same way in real life like they did in Friends... Okay you get my point right?

But Aditya Roy Kapoor.... totally did not fit this mould.. I loved his character . However, in the interviews he seemed to be a completely different person. So he is either a fantastic actor or the director is fantastic.. I can't tell.. and he must have lost a bunch of weight right after the movie, because I kept looking at the movie promotion stills and the songs and he looks very very different!! Check out this photo of Parineeti Chopra and Aditya Roy Kapoor promoting this movie! Crazy right??

Okay here check out another still froma pormotional event :

Seriously is this the same guy? Did he stop eating after coming back from Lucknow?? Why?? Someone please tell him he doesn't need to be this skinny! 

Parineeti Chopra is kinda of the same on and off screen. She has that " laraku" personality that comes out in the movie.. or may be she just chooses to do roles that are like a "phataka" - in any case I like her. She looks real to me. She is not like one of those fake unattainable girls that we see on Bollywood movies.

Anyway.. I really liked the movie actually. My expectations were pretty low when I started watching it and was amazed! only complaint - I wish there was more Aditya Roy Kapoor in the movie, he doesn't come on until 40 minutes into the movie... Dislike!!

Ramdhanu- (Rainbow)

Watched a really good Bangla movie after some time! It is called Ramdhanu.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MEzHMYB3xbM

This movie examines the process of admission to English Medium Private Schools (EMPS) in Kolkata for kids under the age of 5 years! No it is not another boring documentary.. it is more of satire..  it gives us a glimpse of the irony prevalent in a society I grew up, masked with humour.

I have never experienced this madness and for the first time in a long time I felt glad that I was born a long time ago (no, I'm not letting you how old I am! just know it was a longgg time ago)

So it starts off with parent's education level, their bank balance, their status in the society.  Cars driven,  last vacation destination are all taken into consideration to gauge their status. So basically, what it comes down to is - if you slacked off in school and your mark sheet from grade 10 and grade 12 reflect that - your kid's future is F-I-N-SS-E-D!

So if I had kids, my kids would never make it to any prestigious EMPS in Kolkata.. oh but wait, my achievements does not matter that much - I can cook and clean, and that should be good enough. Dad has money rolling in and good education right??.. that's the ONLY thing that matters. So much so that if someone is a single mother, she might have to hire a fake dad to go to the interviews with her. Just to show she has a man who can take care of her! Oh makes me MAADD!

I bet you are thinking getting into a MBA program is a lot easier.

So basically the message of this movie is best summarized in the movie poster above. Focus on a good wholesome education, not just the best school. 

The directors drive the point home and does it in a wonderful way. The comic timing of the male protagonist, Laltu Dutta ( who is the co-director), owner of Dutta Medical Hall is brilliant. His portrayal of a middle class medicine shop(pronounce SOP) owner is very relatable - you see the once para r morere changra chele who has settled down in him. 

Notable mention is Khwaraj Mujherjee - he is simply awesome. He plays the character of a non- Bengali ( possible Marwari) businessman who "helps" your kid get into a good EMPS at a small fee. 

Mitali and Gogol played by Rachna Banerjee and Akashnil Mitra is very natural. No overacting, no nekami that is so common in Bengali commercial movies. As you know in the Bengali masala movies if you are the female protagonist you are either extra neka .. .  or you are rude with an attitude issue.. why else would our heros fall for you?? Din't you know according to the commercial Bangla movies a girl can't be intelligent and sexy at the same time! too much to handle aparently..You have to match the hero's intellectual level after all.

Anyway the reality that Mitali deals with really struck a chord with me. The over inquisitive "friend" who wants to constantly know if her son got into a good school or not, the constant questioning of the neighbours about the status of little Gogol's application... all too familiar!

I have to point out some side story lines used to drive home the point that was not necessary - Mitali's brother's Memsheb girl friend learning Bangla. As if that wasn't enough - she actually asked oh how come you guys are trying to teach your son English and I'm trying to learn Bangla here.. too obvious what tactic you are using.. didn't need to be so blatant! 

Anyway.. great movie, great entertainer that leaves us with something to think about, even try to take baby steps to make the process better, maybe?? 

Game – He Plays To Win!!

So this weekend I thought, instead of writing off the "commercial" Bangla movie completely just by watching the trailer I will actually watch one before I dole out my judgement.
 So after listening to "Tui amar Tatka Priya Marie re" a few times, youtube suggested I watch Game... Wait what?? You don't know anything about Tatka Priya Marie?? Click the link below and check it out right now.. you are missing out!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfksC4UUig0

Yes- Jeet is wooing this girl - saying that she is like is fresh Priya Marie Biscuit that he would like to dip in his lemon tea!
.....I have never been courted by anyone like this so I don't really know how I would feel if someone told me that I was a fresh biscuit.. but the girl in this picture seems perfectly happy, so are her white friends who also decided to join in her celebration!

This was probably the phone conversation between the girl and her white friends:

" OMG you guys! he finally told me that he wants to dip me in his lebu - cha"

Anyway, catchy tune.. very Durgo Pujo e para's dance song like...

Modern lyrics too :  " Likhe Dilam Love you Shona Check koro Facebook"!

Anyway I started watching Game

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6OQGHuksQY

 I was very much into the movie only about 10-15 minutes into it. It was an action/suspense thriller type  movie. I was even saying to myself commercial Bangla movie has come a loong loong way! I remembered Proshenjit's Jamaibabu Zindabad or Swami keno Ashami and felt happy that the movie is actually making sense.

Granted there was chorom nekami by the heorine and heavy doses of overacting in the hero/ heroine Premer scene but I was very excited about the movie.

I started discussing this movie with my family and told them it is a must watch. Then I started doing some research and discovered that this is remake of the Tamil movie Thuppaki starring Vijay and Kajal Agarwal!

I told myself, that okay so we basically took the essence from this Tamil movie and then used our creativity to make it completely Bangla and possibly more awesome! So I started watching the movie in Tamil without subtitles! Well, I didn't have any other choice I was on a quest - turns out it was a scene by scene copy ... oops I meant to say remake.. did I say copy out loud? Sorry!! I mean CTRL C & then CRTL V!  Oh then I found out that there is also a Hindi version starring Akshaye Kumar and Sonakshi Sinha called Holiday.

So basically Tamil movie industry comes up with solid scripts, make movies and then the rest of the country  just copy pastes in their regional languages!

So in light of this, I have decided that I will save myself the trouble of watching all these versions. Instead go straight to source and watch the Tamil movie instead! I know I don't speak or understand language but I'm sure I will figure it out from the partial English phrases and then within the next few months when it comes out in Bengali or Hindi, I will just watch that and get the rest of it !!  Solid Plan, right???

Chotushkon: My Preview and other observations...

So Parambrata's new movie is coming out this Pujo (September 26th) and he is playing a character by the name of Jayabrata - a film director. Interesting right?

Facts  about the movie :

1. This is Srijit's new venture after the National Award Winning "Jatiswar".

2. Music by Anupam Roy - loved the Boshonto Eshe Geche and the Boba Tunnel track.

3. Check out the Trailor here :  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9uNrGCBIgo0

4. Cast : Prambrata, Aparna Sen, Chrinajeet, Gautam Ghosh, Kaushik Ganguly, Koninika, Payal Sarakar, Deblina Dutta among others.

5. Genre : Triller

My Observation :

Before I tell you about my true observations, let me make one thing very clear, I am no movie critic! I am an average movie goer who loves watching intelligent bangla movie.. that's all .. I thought I needed this disclaimer before freely expressing what I really thought!

So the trailer was really obscure! I watched it three times.. Twice before watching the interviews and once after watching the interviews in youtube. I didn't really understand what the movie was about.. except maybe that it was about something dark..may be even something supernatural.. May be it it meant to be Atel.. Anyway, you have to remember this is Srijit's first movie after the National award so pressure to perform at the box office and the national award level is pretty high... . although he claims he wrote this movie long time ago, right after 22nd Srabon. But he had to tweak it a bit since he catered the script to the people playing the characters.

So what is interesting is, they said that each of the 4 main character are directors and their parts of the story are shot in a way they themselves would have shot/ narrated their movie..  I can't wait to see what Param's style would be.

I thought the cast was rather arrogant and show offy during the interviews.. one claimed there was no one else in the industry who could have done this role. Okay may be true.. but is modesty dead?

Parambrata wasn't arrogant - he was asked numerous times how does he feel to do a role that was originally scripted for Rituparna Ghosh.. he fielded the questions brilliantly I think! He acknowledged he wasn't the first choice and then quickly went over to narrate the story of how Srijit approached him for the movie and he had to say yes because it is Srijit after all!! Nicely done!

I really don't know what to expect from this movie. I feel like it feel be either super hit or will vanish into obscurity pretty quick. This will not be an average movie for sure. Unfortunately the marketing strategy employed has not been able to pique my interest! But I wish the movie all the best, hope it does really well.

My Adventures in the near shore Motherland!

So I took the summer off from blogging!  And now I'm back!

I want to tell you all about my latest trip to NY.. well on second thought everyone knows what New York is all about.. right? Wall street, Statue of liberty, Central Park, Manhattan sky line, expensive shopping - you can google it or even better Youtube it. Seach for "What to see in NY" and you will be flooded with thousands of videos. So let me tell you about the hidden gem that is New Jersey- specifically Jersey City.

After being in there I have decided I no longer need to buy super expensive tickets and fly for 22 hours to visit the motherland. I can just visit Newark Avenue in NJ. Don't believe me? Fine take a look at the picture below:

.. Yes it is not some gali in Mumbai, Kolkata or Delhi this is Uniter States of America.

The sights, the sounds and the smell reminded me of India... my cousin took us to this amazing biriyani place called the Paradise Biriyani and the moment we stepped in, we knew we were teleported to Biriyani Paradise. 

We ordered Chicken Biriyani, Mutton Biriyani, Mutton Chap and something else...  and off course Thumbs Up to wash it all down.. 

We ordered so much food because for some weird reason it felt like doom's day is upon us and we need eat as much biriyani as we can! Pictures you ask? In our frenzy to chow down this Regal dish fit for  BadShahi courts I forgot all about documenting it. 

Don't you dare start talking about carbs and all that!! When you are pretending to be in Shah Jahan's court you don't care about your carbohydrate intake.. 

First of all you have been transported back into the 1600s, people don't know about the Atkin's diet or carbohydrates and secondly you already made it to the royal court.. who cares about how you look?? Anyway.. no regal meal can be finished without paan. So off we went into our Indian street into a store called "Mithai" which had paan and they even had the expensive silver foil thing that you see in expensive mishtis back home. Check out the expression of my fellow travellers by just the smell of paan.

Next morning started with Masala Dosa and Masala tea with finger licking good coconut chutney and sambar. They had more delicious food just looking at us from the show case - stuff like pakora, vada, lots and lots and lot colourful mishti.. although the choices seemed to be infinite, my stomach's holding capacity is finite.. well, I could have packed it.. However, I was supposed to do all the touristy things in New York right after and carrying sambar around isn't that easy. However, I did not leave Newark street without some paan from the store that actually looked like a pan store - tiny store, that you can't get into. The shopkeeper was standing at what looked like a window and you had to yell out the order in a very typical Indian style and he would make the fresh paan right in front of you eyes. 

It felt like we were visiting Kolkata during Durga Pujo! 

It was like India had made a near shore support centre for the Street food deprived Indians who live out side of India. It was in essence my near shore Motherland!!!!! Jai New Jersey.

Hickory Dickory Dock!

Last Sunday Rita was getting ready for bed! It was about 10:30 at night! She is slowly inching towards the dreaded age of 30 and so she has made a personal vow of getting into a skin care routine..
She never cared growing up but age is finally catching up and photoshop (if you are a regular user like her) can only take you so far. Hence the attempt to make her skin look FLAWLESS!!

She was half way through her routine, when she suddenly heard a rustling noise! Chill ran down her spine.. was there someone in her apartment? And there was some movement.. armed with her moisturizer bottle and some cotton she slowly started following the noise.. what could it be?

 She kept telling herself.. she is brave, she is empowered and she can face anything in this world.. she wasn't quite sure where the hell she was getting all this confidence.. oh that's right her phone was right in her pyjama pocket- just a quick call to 911 would have multiple modern day knights in matte armour and helmets come over and save this damsel in distress.

The noise was coming from the pantry.. she switched on the light and she saw this was something much bigger than a thief or robber it was a mouse!!!

And the mouse kept running back and forth.... She had no idea what to do.. She was so petrified that even her flight or fight response didn't kick in. She stood there dumb founded for what felt like hours... she slowly stepped back while still keeping her eyes on the mouse.

She read somewhere that when dealing with bears you are supposed keep eye contact and step back so that they don't attack you.. or see you as a threat

Yeah bear and mice are not the same .. but Rita's brain told her that some how they are genetically linked.. DNA.. Genetics .. This is EXACTLY why she studied Neuroscience..
four years and  more than $20,000 tuition fees was finally paying off

So bear and rat and somehow .... distant cousin or some thing and so obviously this was the best course of action... Oh she felt so smart.!!. this is called application.. Mom and dad would be so proud to see their investment in Rita's education finally being fruitful.

She backed up quite a bit, hit the wall and did what any rational and logical person would do.. she grabbed her passport and her expensive face cream and left home!

Next day Rita narrated, the night before's incident to her friends expecting them to be astonished by her courage, application of science and technology in real life and her ability to think on her feet ... instead they broke out into fits of hysterical laughter..Umm, whatever!
One friend even said..  you know they have mice in other countries as well.. so your passport wouldn't have helped you that much What??
The only reason Rita took her passport was because.. umm. for some very important reason.. that she didn't want to discuss... Whatever! People have no appreciation for intelligence these days!

Drop Dead Diva

So if I died.. whose body would I want to come back in and what would I do? Well, don't call me morbid.. TV is making me think like this! Don't believe me? Fine.. read the quote below from the opening credits from the TV show drop dead diva and you will know for yourself!


" See that aspiring model out there? That was me Deb, until the day I died. I thought I would go straight to heaven but there was a bit of mix up and I ended up in someone else's body. Now  I'm Jane - - I'm a super busy lawyer with my very own assistant. I got a new life, a new ward robe and the only people who know about it are my girlfriend Stacy and my guardian angel friend. I used to think every thing happened for a reason.. I sure hope so"

..... Any rational thinking person would not take this seriously! Then again who makes rational TV or movies any more.. You don't agree? 

Okay let's look at some Hollywood blockbusters.. Spiderman? Superman? Transformers? Are they rational by any means? They are larger than life and pure fantasy. And this is somewhere in the middle! 

This is a feel good show- she wins every single case! But would I like it if she didn't? Probably not. I think really great escapade at least for me.. it sort of tells you everything will be alright all the time, even if you drop dead.. literally.. you can come back from the dead and suddenly make a huge money by becoming a lawyer. Uh Ha.. you can.. but why would you want to die in th first place.. well shit happens, okay! 

I'm just trying to imagine this in a bollywood  frame work  or a balaji show framework.. it would probably be called kyunki Deb bhi khabi Jane thi.. (because deb was once jane) and the think is.. it will be much more dramatic.. 

If you think Drop dead diva is cheesy think about what it would be like in a balaji series.. there will be songs, there will be dancing in the rain and Jane will have a perfect figure .. although people around her will be calling her fat directly/ indirectly.. See bigger people in Indian movies are only used in a comical role or not at all.. I"m not saying you shouldn't be healthy and all... you should try to shed the excess pounds but I don't think you can make it into TV in India if you are a bigger person, not without a whole lot of criticism any way. Look at Parineeti Chopra and Sonakshi Sinha.. people in the media call them curvy... are you serious?? Do you even know what curvy really means?? 

Well any way back to my kyunki Deb bhi kabhi Jane thi.. oh I bet Sunny Deol will make an appearance and have his famous dialogue in there..  Tariq pe Tariq ...  Who would be cast as Deb and Stacy and Jane? 

I would cast Katrina Kaif as Deb - so she will appears in the credits but that is pretty much it!  Stacy will be Sonam Kapoor - she will fit right in to Stacy's character - haha I think you know why.. Off course I'm referring to her fashion sense.. what did you think?

Who will be Grayson? Well I had a couple of choices but I think the clear winner is Gautam Rode- he is a TV actor yes! but I think he will fit in perfectly! 

Kim Caswell will be Ashwairya.. she has this annoying thing going on - she is annoyed with everything in the world.. she gives smart ass answers, she is good looking and she thinks she is very smart!  Thank God, the show will he in hindi.. otherwise her fake accent wold have killed everything. 

Okay, so all we need right now to make a call to Balaji and convince them to take this on.. I even have a title with K in it picked out!!!

What does Sine curve and 22 Jump Street have in common?

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 IMDB  has a 8.1 rating from 13,000 voters for 22 Jump Street. There is so much chatter as to how it is so much better than the previous movie, but I'm sorry, I disagree!

 Now, now, I am a grown up and I just don't like a movie because it has Channing Tatum in it. I have sound judgement now and Mr. Tatum had no role to play in my decision making process to watch this particular movie. I swear.. I mean look at his face..  you think his smouldering good looks can convince me?

Well okay, may be a tiny bit, but that's it!

But seriously though, I was disappointed with the movie. Don't get me wrong, it was funny and in some instances hilarious - but it wasn't interesting. As in the story didn't have any meat. They focused way too much on being funny and way too less on the story line.

I compare the movie to a sine curve - it was good and then it was bad and then it was good again and it was repetitive.. just how Wikipedia defines sine curve!

There were some sub plot line whose significance I failed to understand. It didn't take the movie forward, it didn't really see how it contributed to the story other than proving a point that it is different than last time.

Example :
Channing Tatum being a jock ! Okay you are trying to portray that high school was awful for Jenko and college was awesome but how did that help us catch the drug dealers? They didn't really get to the drug source. Yes he became really good friends with the football players and that gave us some hilarious moments of Schmidt trying to fit in but that was not unexpected funny!
I thought it was very used and abused real life -fat-guy-is-not-as-fit-as-a-jock kinda obvious funny which is very last season funny.

What I think we liked about 21 Jump Street was the fact the not so popular wannabe Slim Shady of a decade ago was instantly popular with the cool kids of today! The audience wasn't expecting it. The punks and the drug dealers weirdly cared about the environment and the nerd kid of the 90s actually blended in really well with the popular ones!

But 22 Jump Street had nothing like that.

They latched on to "bromance" that they started in the previous movie - "Will you go to prom with me" and just went on and on to  the point it lost it's novelty and was no longer funny!

Summary of the movie : The "partners" fought, they made up and they kicked the gangstar's ass! THE END!

Before I sign out for today let's just talk about the action sequences shall we?

Was this a big Hollywood break for a struggling Bollywood action director? Or was it a cruel joke played on a poor Bollywood action director who thought he made it in Hollywood, only to find out the only reason he was picked was to enhance the comedy factor in the film !

 Channing Tatum doing Dhisoom dhisoom was fine.. But Channing hitting the Gang-sTaz with the legs of a drunk girl who was sitting on his shoulder.. really?
Channing Tatum jumping on to a helicopter after being hit by a bullet in his arm from the top of a building? REALLY?

Let me make one thing super clear here folks! Only and ONLY Akhshay Kumar has the right to do that and nobody else!

Ridiculous! You are just going to watch a Khiladi movie, get inspired by our super awesome stunts and as a hard core Bollywood movie fanatic we would just let that slide? In "Didi"'s words NEBHARRRRR!!

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Why Humpty Sharma ki Dulhania will be a hit!

Dharma Productions's Humpty Sharma ki Dulhania (HSKD) is all set for release on July 11. Will this movie be a hit?

Offcourse! Have you noticed the marketing efforts they have put into it? No? Okay let me  break it down and tell me if you disagree:

1.Karan Johar movie: That brand name alone will get all the hardcore Masala movie lovers all excited!

2.Macro to Micro : I like this strategy of creating interest in your audience

First there was a poster -see above. With nothing else.
Then there was a "home video" of the actors saying that they are trying to make this video secretly before the trailer comes to out to tell the audience what the movie is about... Almost giving you a secret insight..

My question here is does anyone really fall for it? Unless you are 10 off course.. may be the intent is not to make you believe it is real.. but to make you feel like you had a chance to be a part of the celebrity's life outside of the movie, even if it is for 2 minute and 15 seconds

3. Filmy style trailer launch in YouTube. 

Fun Trailer - very next gen type dialogues, more direct flirting .. no running around in chiffon sarees in snow capped mountains. Just running around in normal clothing around Delhi. Catchy tunes, defining who the hero and who the "vedesi" villain is! I liked the presentation of the trailor. Check it out by clicking the link below :

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWMWEhOjmFs

They actually have titled the video filmy style trailer launch.

4. Using Social Media to it's fullest :

They have a FB page, a twitter account. But what is important to note is Karan Johar tweets about how HSKD trailor has had 1 million views. 1 million views is an achievement in it self. But when KJO tweets about it - the impact doubles.. why? he has 3.9 million followers and even if 1/3 of them view it, there you go another million.

Varun Dhawan, has changed his name on Twitter and it read Varun Humpty Dhawan - I like this promo strategy as well.

5. Using television to promote it:

Okay this is sort of an old strategy in Bollywood now, but a strategy that works! The cast and director/ producer come on to these various talent shows as the judges and in turn promotes their movies!

They have even satrted scripting parts in very popular soaps in India like - Bade Achhe Lagte Hain and the like to promote their movies. Annoys me .. but you know what, it works.

What about the story you ask? Since when has a Bollywood Masala film need a story line you can follow? The packaging matters the most and it has all of that!

 - Good Looking actors - check
- Big banner - check
- Lot of unique promotion techniques - check

Okay if you really want to know about the storyline this is what I gathered from the promo :

Story based in Delhi. Girl meets boy in college/ neighbourhood. They become friends. Boy is a fun loving guy , girl is a diva but sweet at the same time . Don't forget it is a KJO movie, the girl has to be a diva! (Did you forget "PooH" in K3G?)

Girl's parents are trying to get her married to NRI (non - resident Indian).
Boy gets drunk with girl one night and realises he loves her. But now the NRI guy is in India to marry girl... boy has to do something to win her back AND surprise surprise he finally does!!!  ANd they live happily ever after ... Again as I mentioned not important!

I'm predicting Anupama Chopra will give it a 2.5 star and audience will give it a 4 star! And the movie will be a hit!! Will be part of the so called "100 crore" club!